the lonely stoner seems to free his mind at night

Problems/ Things / Drama

Okay i have to wholeheartedly agree with mia on this everything going well to everything going badly phase.My life is always like that. I am doing very well financially at the moment, so I have been splurging lately on myself and my friends and my family. After all you only get one life. Recession or no recession, if I have it I'm going to make myself happy with it. Like my car insurance and cell bill are paid through til May. And I have a nice surplus built up. Im going to save it. It feels good to not worry about money, I'm not gonna lie. Like I know its a blessing to be able to go shopping without paying attention to prices. However money does not always bring happiness. Here are some issues right now that money cant solve:

1. I got a B+ on a paper thats worth 10% of my grade in a class I got nothing but A's in so far. If 90% of my grade is an A and 10% is a B+ can I still get an A? I dont want an A minus. I hope I didnt screw up.

2. I'm behind in studying.

3. None of my friends here are in my major. This means as a junior and senior we will all be doing different things. This happened in high school too. I hate this. It makes me doubt my priorities - what's more important to me? Maybe not for other people, but for me my friends mean a whole lot. I know they wonder why I depend on them so much. I value their opinion almost as much as my own. In the end I do what I want but I am a very loyal person and like Im worried that in this dog eat dog world forces are trying to separate us. 

4. its another really hard major at my school I wish I were in. I know it would have been perfect and challenging. Too bad its way too late to start it. And I guess its not a field I want to work in either. But still, its what I really wanted. I wish I were doing it. I like what Im doing now and it's intuitive to me but I mean Im just one of those people who is always more worried about what she is missing out on than what she has.

5. Is that a problem? WHy am I always more worried about what I am missing out on than what I have? Is that just ambition or do I have a problem?

6. I need a summer job. I think I have one but I'm not sure. i know no one wants to hire me because I have minimal work experience but please someone give me a chance! I'm not living in shame this summer, if I dont have a summer job Im running away. Like Im praying that I will have a summer job. I know while I have everything going for myself, I'm missing something vital.: a job. I like doing things and Im wasting time. I could be working and being productive.

7. i need to finish this online class before  like next week, someone paid me 200$ to do it for them, so i need to finish.

 8. im horrible at time management

9. im a girl so i cant be a jackass to get some whenever I want it, i have to try to think like a girl and stay celibate or whatever you call it when you havent had sex in a while cause its no one worth having sex with and you refuse to lower your standards FML and FMHormones

-good things-

10. i like someone here

11. im starting a website

12. im getting a tattoo

13. im rooming in the social party dorm with one of my besties here

14. i am doing well with my car.

15. im getting an apartment within the next year. justin you ready! lol

Dez out