I was about to post some real cruddy shit but I need to just sit back and think. Real talk, shit got way to out of control for no reason at all. Like right now, I'm so mad that I want to cry but its not even all that. Like before all this shit we was mad cool and then dumbass alcohol and weed messed shit up, but I guess thats why weed is illegal and the drinking age is 21. Like just thinking back on these past couple months, I really have been acting reckless. Before I was innocent and I had shit planned out and lately, I've just been going with the flow but that def needs to stop. I need to put a check on myself. I am officially giving up alcohol (maybe weed lol).
In terms of him, I really am sorry if I hurt his pride. I honestly mean that. Like what I just did was hella petty but I was angry. Honestly, I think I only had sex as pay back for a pervious act that I was still slightly heated over. Like I know I kept saying I was ok with it but clearly I wasn't. Anyway, you were a good friend when you were sober and who knows? we might still have been friends if you had stopped drinking.
Anyway, I know there are people who read this blog and normally see me being a bitch or acting cruddy but I am not like that. I only blog when I am angry as a way to vent. It is rare that I blog just because. So just know that I really am a sensitive person and the way I am feeling right now proves it even when I don't want to accept it. If I could take it back, I would but I can't so now I have to move on.
WipeTheTearBeforeItFalls
Peace Sandra
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